Splash, spin, and swing into San Antonio's best spring activities for the whole family

FAMILY FUN

Hemisfair/ Facebook

Phew! You made it to Spring Break. After juggling soccer practice, homework, and packed lunches for weeks, Spring Break arrived and brought the next parenting challenge — keeping the kids from bouncing off the walls.

Fear not. While plopping down the brood for a repeat viewing of Encanto may be tempting, most moms and dads have heard enough about Bruno. Instead, pack sunscreen and wet wipes for an affordable adventure on the town. And most of these events last long after Spring Break is over, so you can keep the fun going as the school days count down and temps start to climb.

Los Trompos Experience at the Shops of La Cantera
The whole family can take a spin inside these kinetic sculptures, designed by Héctor Esrawe and Ignacio Cadena to mimic life-sized tops. And since they are in one of San Antonio’s largest shopping centers, parents can get some errands done too. Free daily through April 9.

Morgan’s Wonderland
An amusement park for people of all abilities, this Wonderland has a sensory zone, sand pits, a train ride, and playgrounds that every family member can enjoy. Though the park will be open the entirety of Spring Break, check the calendar for other March dates. Admission starts at $13.

Nature Exploration at the San Antonio Botanical Garden
Break out the purple backpack. Every youngster’s inner Dora Marquez will adore the outdoor fun at the Family Adventure Garden. Each week features a different activity to inspire a lifelong love of nature. Included with $13-$16 admission, Wednesdays through October 25, 10-10:30 am.

Poolside Movies at San Antonio Marriott Rivercenter
Go un poco loco at this outdoor screening of Pixar’s classic Coco. Food and drinks will be available for purchase starting at 6:30 pm. Free screenings March 11 and 18, 7-9 pm.

Spring Break Family Day at San Antonio Museum of Art
Who says a little learning can’t be squeezed into Spring Break? Ties to SAMA’s latest exhibition, this exciting afternoon offers art-making experiences, story times, food vendors, performances, and more. Free, March 14, 10 am-7 pm.

Super Fun Saturday with H-E-B
Starting March 18, San Antonio’s beloved grocer will host a series of third-Saturday events sure to keep even the most gregarious child engaged. Crafts, vendors, live music, and more will delight the whole family, while monthly themes like Spring is Blooming provide adorable opportunities to fill the photo album. Free, first Saturday of every month through October, 11 am-1pm.

Union Pacific Railroad Splashpad
Whatever the threat to an Explorer’s upholstery, kids can while away hours dashing through dancing waters. With wheelchair accessibility, comfy lawn furniture, and plenty of shade, Yanaguana Garden might have the best splashpad in the city. Plus, nearby treats from Dough Pizzeria Napoletana and Paletería San Antonio keep hangry fits at bay. Free daily, 9am-9 pm.

"Very Eric Carle: A Very Hungry, Quiet, Lonely, Clumsy, Busy Exhibit" at the DoSeum
Yes, the exhibit name is quite a mouthful, but what would one expect from something so jam-packed? Inspired by the Very Hungry Caterpillar author’s beloved works, the activities include weaving a web and composing a night symphony. $16 admission for ages 1 and up. Wednesday - Monday through April 16

Photo courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures

Onscreen intrigue in Don't Worry Darling blunts off-screen drama

Movie Review

Opportunities for female directors have only been growing in recent years, a development that’s taken too long to happen. One of the beneficiaries of this sea change is Olivia Wilde, who made her directorial debut with 2019’s well-received Booksmart. Now she’s back with her highly-anticipated (for an assortment of reasons) sophomore film, Don’t Worry Darling.

The film stars Florence Pugh as Alice Chambers, who lives in a utopian small desert town with her husband, Jack (Harry Styles), who works for a company called Victory. The town has all the trappings of an idyllic version of the 1950s, from the style of the houses to the cars to the way the wives dote on their husbands. But right away it’s clear there’s something off about the town, especially since everyone seems to hold up the company’s leader, Frank (Chris Pine), as some kind of infallible person.

Olivia Wilde and Nick Kroll in Don't Worry Darling Photo courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures

Alice starts to sense the cracks in town’s veneer, and gradually tests the boundaries that everyone else adheres to faithfully. Her suspicions only deepen when another wife disappears, and anyone with whom she chooses to confide gaslights her into thinking that she’s losing her mind. Trying to figure out what’s real or not drives her to do many things that threaten the whole town’s way of life.

Collaborating once again with Booksmart writer Katie Silberman, Wilde creates a mysterious and tension-filled film that is about as far away from the revelry of her previous film as you could get. There are times when the story starts to become too enigmatic for its own good, but Wilde seems to know exactly when to add on a new layer to keep viewers interested in where the story will take them next.

Wilde and Silberman also continue to explore gender politics through this well-told allegory. The actions of Alice and the other women (which include Wilde, Gemma Chan, Kiki Layne, Kate Berlant, and others) come off as Stepford Wives-ish, but they also act in ways inconsistent with people who have been brainwashed. When secrets finally start to be revealed, the story takes on a deeper meaning of male insecurity and female empowerment.

Chris Pine in Don't Worry Darling Photo courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures

The behind-the-scenes technical team greatly aids in the mood of the film. The production design by Katie Byron is impeccable, and it and the desert landscape are shot extremely well by cinematographer Matthew Libatique. Especially standing out is the score by John Powell, who utilizes unconventional sounds and voices to create music that elevates every scene to which it’s attached.

Pugh has already been a star for several years, and she shows yet again why she’s held in such high esteem. She brings just the right level of angst, confusion, and anger to the evolution of her character, making her compelling throughout. Styles acquits himself well in his biggest role to date, never coming off as just a singer pretending to be an actor. Pine is also great as the creepy-but-charismatic Frank, demonstrating skills that every good cult leader needs.

Don’t Worry Darling holds a lot more than what it shows on the surface, making it a great second film for the talented Wilde. With a proven ability to jump between genres effortlessly, she should be given many more opportunities to tell stories on the big screen.

---

Don't Worry Darling opens in theaters on September 23.

Don't Worry Darling | Official Trailerwww.youtube.com

Ad Placement 300x100

Ad Placement 300x600

CultureMap Emails are Awesome

Property Showcase

Whataburger weighs in as healthiest cheeseburger in the nation

THEMS EATIN' WORDS

With its love of greasy enchiladas, gluttonous fried steaks, and fat-speckled brisket, San Antonio isn’t exactly known as a healthy eating mecca. But it turns out that one locally beloved dish isn’t as unhealthy as one might think.

Inspired by February’s American Heart Month (albeit belatedly), Gambling.com decided to dig deep into which fast-food burger was best for the ticker and the body overall. What that has to do with online slots is anyone’s guess, but perhaps open-heart surgeries are not conducive to risk-taking.

Surprise, surprise, surprise! Local favorite/ food cult Whataburger took the top slot, earning honors with its standby cheeseburger. Assumably, the gambling site considered the mustard-slathered original, eschewing calorie bombs like bacon slices and creamy pepper sauce. Where’s the fun of Whataburger if you can’t get it just like you like it?

To arrive at the rankings, Gambling.com analyzed each burger for sugar, fat, salt, and calorie content per ounce. Each metric was given a one to ten score that factored into the final report card shared with content-hungry food journalists everywhere.

Coming in a close second was In-N-Out’s cheeseburger, a comforting fact for Texans who enjoy complaining about Californians. Rounding out the top five were Checker’s Checkerburger with Cheese, Culver’s ButterBurger Cheese, and Del Taco’s del Cheese Burger.

For those trying to make better eating choices, that list should give some pause. Yes, Whataburger beats out other fast-food faves, but it was competing against a chain that literally toasts all their buns in churned cream. Health is a relative concept.

Elsewhere on the list was another Texas darling, the No. 6 ranked Dairy Queen. Apparently, all that “hungr” is being busted by a hefty dose of sodium. Yes, we will take fries with that.

Disney's Little Mermaid remake goes swimmingly despite new so-so songs

Movie review

The biggest problem with the majority of the live-action updates to classic Disney animated films is that they haven’t been updates at all, choosing to merely regurgitate the moments audiences know and love from the original in a slightly repackaged form. That’s great for nostalgia, but if that’s all viewers wanted, they’d just go back and watch the original.

The Little Mermaid falls into much the same trap, although the filmmakers get at least a little credit for trying to offer something new. The story, of course, remains the same, as Ariel (Halle Bailey) has a fascination with everything above the surface of the ocean. Her rebellious nature, at odds with strict King Triton (Javier Bardem), leads her to spy on a ship with Prince Eric (Jonah Hauer-King) and his crew, putting her in position to save Eric when the ship crashes into rocks.

Now totally enamored of Eric, Ariel is convinced by the sea witch Ursula (Melissa McCarthy) to give up her voice for a chance to live on land and make Eric fall in love with her. Trouble is, despite the help of Sebastian the crab (Daveed Diggs), Flounder the fish (Jacob Tremblay), and Scuttle the seabird (Awkwafina), Ursula has no plans to let Ariel succeed fair and square.

Directed by Rob Marshall and written by David Magee, the film clocks in at nearly one hour longer than the original, going from 83 minutes to 135. They accomplish this feat with the addition of several songs, including ones “sung” by Ariel while she is without voice, a relatively clever way to get into her thoughts during that long stretch. There are also additional scenes that give Prince Eric more of a backstory, making him more than just a pretty face on which to hang all of Ariel’s hopes and dreams.

The new songs are hit-and-miss; Ariel’s “For the First Time” is a fanciful number that fits in nicely, but “Wild Uncharted Waters,” a solo song for Prince Eric, feels unnecessary, and the less said about “The Scuttlebutt,” a rap performed by Scuttle and written by Lin-Manuel Miranda, the better. What most people want to see are how the original songs are done, and they come off well for the most part. The actors’ voices are uniformly good and the staging is engaging.

Other changes seem half-hearted, at best. A vague environmental theme broached at the beginning is quickly dropped. The cast is very multicultural, but haphazardly so. The film is obviously set on and around a Caribbean island, making it natural for The Queen (Noma Dumezweni), Eric’s adopted mother, and other islanders to be Black. But giving Ariel “sisters from the seven seas,” allowing for mermaids of several different races and ethnicities, feels odd and forced, and a little creepy given that King Triton is supposed to be the father of all of them.

The fact that Bailey herself is Black, while great for representation, is neither here nor there in the context of the film. Bailey has a voice that is equal to everything she is asked to sing, and her silent acting is excellent in the middle portion of the film. McCarthy makes for a great Ursula, bringing both humor and pathos to the role. Hauer-King, who bears a similarity to Ryan Gosling, plays Eric in a more well-rounded manner.

The live-action version of The Little Mermaid, like almost all of the Disney remakes, never truly establishes itself as its own unique thing. Still, it’s a thoroughly pleasant watch with some nice performances, which clears the bar for success for this era of Disney history.

---

The Little Mermaid opens in theaters on May 26.

Photo courtesy of Disney

Halle Bailey in The Little Mermaid.

These 6 San Antonio museums are offering free admission for military families all summer long

spread the museum love

Half a dozen San Antonio museums are honoring active-duty military personnel and their families with free admission through the Blue Star Museums initiative, May 20 through September 4, 2023.

Established by the National Endowment for the Arts, Blue Star Families, and the U.S. Department of Defense, the Blue Star Museums program annually provides military families free access to 2,000 museums nationwide throughout the summer. The program begins yearly on Armed Forces Day in May and ends on Labor Day.

Free admission is extended to personnel currently serving in the U.S Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps, Coast Guard (including those in the Reserve), and all National Guardsman. Members of the U.S. Public Health Commissioned Corps and NOAA Commissioned Corps are also included in the program.

Those who qualify can use their military ID to bring up to five family members - including relatives of those currently deployed. More information about qualifications can be found here.

There is no limit on the number of participating museums that qualifying families may visit. Admission for non-active military veterans, however, is not included.

According to the National Endowment for the Arts website, the initiative was created to help "improve the quality of life for active duty military families" with a specific focus on children. The site states two million have had a parent deployed since 2001.

"Blue Star Museums was created to show support for military families who have faced multiple deployments and the challenges of reintegration," the website says. "This program offers these families a chance to visit museums this summer when many will have limited resources and limited time to be together."

Here's a look at all the museums in San Antonio that are participating in the Blue Star Museums initiative this year.

For those looking to take a drive around Central Texas, the Sophienburg Museum & Archives in New Braunfels and Bandera's Frontier Times Museum are also participants in the Blue Star Museums initiative.

More information about Blue Star Museums and a full list of participants can be found on arts.gov.

View All Listings